IT’S ME, RIGHT?

BRYCE ON POLITICS

– As Johnny Nash sang, “I can see clearly now, the rain is gone. Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind.”

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I had an epiphany recently. I get them every so often, particularly in our consulting business or when writing. It’s a sudden awareness of something, where the clouds part and everything somehow clicks into place. Actually, it’s a wonderful feeling, and I had another just recently.

Ever since I turned 50, I began to notice changes around me, such as in the corporate world, politics, or just day-to-day life. The world was changing and I discovered:

* 2 + 2 no longer equaled 4 (at least according to Common Core).

* What I considered right was now wrong and vice versa. This greatly influenced my moral judgement and perception of others.

* Common sense is no longer common, nor is common courtesy. I questioned our reasoning abilities, our perspectives, and our socialization skills. For example, common sense would suggest we cannot spend more than we bring in; that a declaration of bankruptcy is dishonorable; that we should save money in order to make a down payment to purchase a house. This is evidently not so anymore.

* That we are judged more by our words than our actions. Everything today must be done in accordance with political correctness.

* What is mine is evidently not, and should be given to others. I am being encouraged by the government to do less work, not more, and not to be entrepreneurial in spirit.

* That we still live in a barbaric world, particularly in Africa, Asia, and the Middle East. Even though our technology has changed and our weaponry has been vastly improved, the world is still a tinderbox.

This disturbed me for quite some time. It even angered me. Then WHAM, my epiphany. Evidently I had it wrong, all wrong; that my parents had misled me, that my teachers, government and church had lied to me, and everyone was playing me for a fool. It was me, my perception of right and wrong that was distorted, not others. Why else would we celebrate bankruptcy? Why else should we not work and have the government subsidize us? Why else should we avoid responsibility?

The first thing I did was decide on a makeover. I let my beard grow scruffy, even though it is now white, and no longer bother to comb my hair. I also wear my pants down so others can enjoy my sexy underwear, and I had my nose pierced. I feel more comfortable not having to wear clean clothes anymore, but I sometimes itch.

I am now contemplating dropping out and allowing the government to pick up the check. I’m expecting a free smart phone and a truckload of groceries any day now. Unemployment tells me I have to try and get a job, but who do they think they are kidding? Oh, by the way, thanks for the drugs, even though I do not need them for medicinal purposes. I am entitled to it.

I now watch MSNBC regularly after realizing Fox News was lying to me all these years. Isn’t Rachel Maddow wonderful? She makes it clear what a great job President Obama is doing. Whereas I originally didn’t understand the humor of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, now I think they are hillarious. And I’ve even gone so far as to join the Brian Williams fan club. Thank goodness the Democratic party no longer insists on embracing God and have successfully labeled the GOP the new “Axis of Evil.” By the way, my prayer rug looks great in my foyer.

Once I admitted, “It’s me,” everything seemed to clear up and I have a new set of friends with a much higher IQ, and the press now finds my articles more acceptable. Today I hang out in a huge mansion with my friends who claim we have squatter’s rights over the person who owns it. Boy, do I love not having to pay bills anymore. I am also looking forward to voting multiple times in the next election.

I am not sure what exactly caused the epiphany. Maybe it had something to do with that packet of Kool-Aid I received in the mail.

“It’s me, right?” Say it.

Keep the Faith!

Note: All trademarks both marked and unmarked belong to their respective companies.

Tim Bryce is a writer and the Managing Director of M&JB Investment Company (M&JB) of Palm Harbor, Florida and has over 30 years of experience in the management consulting field. He can be reached at [email protected]

For Tim’s columns, see:
timbryce.com

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Copyright © 2014 by Tim Bryce. All rights reserved.

NEXT UP:  D-DAY +70 YEARS – WE WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER – A tribute to our Normandy vets, and a history lesson for our youth.

LAST TIME:  MAN VERSUS NUMBERS  – How we are losing the common touch.

Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), and KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Dave Ettl & Lance Tormey (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific). Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.

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